Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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