I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
