Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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