The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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