Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
