stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize