Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
