I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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