so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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