how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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