evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
