apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
