final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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