We're like a lot better than the average bears
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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