i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
