when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I won't apologize to a one balled man
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
