Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
