i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
