Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize