My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
