Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
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