YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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