summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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