Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
