you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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