Welp...herpes.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
