remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
