i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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