even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
