I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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