There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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