she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
