He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
