More tranny stories later!
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
