She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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