well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
