ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
