Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
