Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You need a sexual gate keeper
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
