even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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