I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize