The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Where is the hickey?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize