Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
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