What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize