Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
