I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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