we made out on top of his cat.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize