watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
