ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize