I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
