I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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